Domination: A Persistant Resistance to Lies

Hello my name is Zeke Allen, I have yet to be sober for any amount of time but I am here and that is worth something I guess. I have participated, propagated and been subjugated to the powers of domination. Through years of enculturation, both consciously and subconsciously, it has seeped into my being and now I am left to sort through my mess and begin some spring cleaning.
In our country and world, radicals are killed. By radicals I mean, those that refuse to give in to and consciously rebel against oppressive systems. I am part of some of these systems of oppression. Within the Christian church at large, anyone who speaks against institutional Christianity in a way that threatens its power is demonized and considered a heretic. For instance, as I begin to find my voice as an advocate for scandalous grace I am met with much opposition. I have become a staunch advocate for the voice and rights of women. My wife is a female pastor who has continually been subjected to demeaning, misconduct by her male peers and to a much larger construct those within the communities she serves. A few examples of peer oppression are: (1) dress- female pastors are constantly judged and weighed by their appearance and clothing. If a female embraces her femininity and wears clothes that fit she is considered a slut or racy, if she is overweight and wears loose clothes she is considered a slob, if she cries she is considered over-emotional and unable to adequately execute any judgments needed for successful leadership, if she is overpowering people are put off because “women just shouldn’t be that strong”; (2) voice- too soft and you are being seductive, too sarcastic and you are a “bitch”, too insightful and you are dangerous, too loud and you are egotistical, and too radical and you must be put in your place; (3) tolerance- it is generally acceptable that women should just “tolerate” inappropriate comments regardless of their origin or overtone; and finally (4)family- people find it almost impossible to believe that a woman can be both a great mom and a great professional.
I am a heterosexual male and am beginning to find my voice as a staunch supporter of gay and lesbian acceptance and empowerment within the church. This is so threatening to the church institution and somehow to the greater political system that it just makes people mad that I would even tolerate such “people” much less accept them as one of us. It is not enough to “tolerate” and to be silent, for this is in effect to agree with any oppressive system you see occurring. It is doubly offensive to become aware of a system of oppression and remain silent on the matter. Apathy is one of the greatest diseases within our American society today. To do nothing is to approve and that, for me, is no longer adequate or permissible.
I have participated in the domination system in so many ways. I know there are many of which I am yet unaware of but the following are a few that I am now aware of. I am survivor of sexual abuse and yet I have been a minimal advocate for others who have yet to find any voice and even greater who feel isolated and powerless. I realize that my inaction and my voicelessness have propagated the system that silences the voices of the abused for fear that we might as a society become aware of the crisis of abuse in our communities. As one in ministry among this society, I have allowed the voices of peers, who advised me to not ever share my story the power over preventing me from sharing my story in hope that it might empower others to voice theirs. I have, in past relationships both intimate and friendships, participated in the systematic hierarchy of males and females as I interacted quite differently with males and females. I gave males more voice and more power thus allowing them more influence in my life and my choices. I have participated in the myth of redemptive violence by initially advocating the “war on terror” blindly following the “leaders” of our country. I have further participated in this myth by placing my children in front a TV that advocates violence- in particular MMA. My family recently attended a wrestling match of one of my students. My three year old son leaned over to me and asked “when are they going to start hitting each other?” That hit me hard knowing that I had exposed him to the myth that beating each other up was a sport and acceptable. Most of all, I have been silent. I have allowed apathy and fear prevent me of finding my voice and acting on that which so often burns inside of me.
We resist the domination system and its myth of redemptive violence by action and voice. We must, as awake and sober people, pursue a persistent resistance to all injustice which comes into our view. We must sensitize ourselves first and then put words to our ideologies and then action to this purpose. We must combat apathy and act with hope in justice. Even when failure seems imminent, we must engage in a persistent resistance for all those around us who go about life unaware and apathetic to the lies they are being fed.
Are we really free? Again, my name is Zeke Allen and I will seek a persistent resistance to systematic domination. I won’t be put down, silenced even if I am let down, kicked out and shut out. I will not go away. If a door closes, I will find a window to crawl through. “Hope comes in the morning. Today and every one after that I will tenaciously seek awareness and action. My prayer and mantra shall be: “Open my eyes, set my feet on justice’s path and let me pursue truth beyond comfort”.